Friday, April 08, 2005

My how you've grown

Piper attends a Mother's Day Out program on Thursday mornings for 3 hours. Just 3 hours and I miss her somethin fierce. I can't wait to pick her up and hug her and kiss her and be with her. Can you say "over-bonded"? When I drop her off a little piece of my heart stays there with her and I am sad...sad not because I am leaving her but sad because she is growing up.

It's funny because I now have 2 children at two very different stages. Finn has started eating solids so I feed her and honestly I can't wait until she is Piper's age and can feed herself. But then there is Piper who is in between independence and reliance on me...it is a moment to moment struggle that I can actually physically see her going through...she takes off and then checks back in then takes off again. She needs constant reassurance and I'm actually a bit relieved because that means she still needs me. How silly am I? I always thought that I wouldn't be one of "those mothers" that is so overly-attatched and hangs on their child's every milestone, and yet here I am guilty as charged. I want all the sweetness of the baby time without any of the chores of the care-taking.

We went to the beach yesterday. I took the girls BY MYSELF. yeah, fun. It actually wasn't that bad...except for the lugging of our entire house in a beach cart through the dunes while Finn is in her sling and Piper is yelling at me to take her shoes off because heaven forbid she get sand in her BEACH SANDALS. The best part about it was all the people that passed me on their way down to the beach while noticing my struggle and desperately trying to avoid eye-contact. We were there for a little over 3 hours, I can hardly believe.

All day today after I picked Piper up from MDO she kept saying..."mommy's gone, mama's gone..." *sniff*

I'm right here!

1 comment:

Eric said...

I know what it's like. I can't wait to have some hours away for myself, but when it happens? I ache for him and cannot wait to get back to him.

I completely understand those mothers who totally have no idea what to do when their youngest moves out. I refuse to be one of those mother's, but I completely understand it.