I am at the very end of my rope and it is unraveling fast. I am physically exhausted. I am very short with my girls and I keep getting set off by the smallest thing and yelling at them. I hate yelling. I hate this feeling. I hate being angry with them. I feel so guilty. Each time I yell and they look back at me with eyes welling up with tears my heart sinks down into my chest and feels like it weighs so much that i can't breath. There is so much to do and I can't get it done because I have no motivation and every spare minute that the girls are awake i have to have them in my sights so that other things are not destroyed.
I keep telling myself:
The moment is as it is
What you resist will persist
It will get easier, just when?
see? I most definitely do not have it together.